Guide to Butt Plugs and Anal Toys

Any form of erotic sensual play in or around the anus is referred to as anal sex. Most people think of anal sex as inserting a penis into the rectum; however, it also includes rimming the anus with your tongue as well as inserting fingers or various sex toys, devices, veggies or other household items.

Here are some helpful diagrams:

Some spots within each of us produce incredible orgasms when stimulated. In anal sex, those spots are the prostate, or P-spot, for men (see the Male diagram) and the A-spot (see the Female diagram).

Men can stimulate their prostate, or P-spot, by penetrating their ass, massaging it with their fingers or a dildo. Others thrust a dildo, another toy, their fingers or some other object into their prostate to achieve their own preferred pleasure. Whatever the choice, it is one’s own personal desire.

Although the A-spot (see above) is not located within the rectum, it nevertheless is a special, secret location farther in the vagina than the G-spot for women. Pressure from anal play inside the rectum can trigger the A-spot, resulting in a deeper, more satisfying orgasm. So ladies, don’t dismiss anal sex too quickly.

Regardless of gender, anyone can appreciate or learn to enjoy anal sex. A key component of creating a fantastic sex life is knowing your own body and what makes you happy.

Anal is popular for a number of reasons:

• Either gender can achieve intense orgasms with anal added to the mix.
• Men’s prostate, or P-spot is accessible with their fingers or toys.
• The surrounding erogenous zones are stimulated from increased pressure.
• The double penetration (DP) fantasy can be experienced by women.
• Anal can make a person feel extremely vulnerable, which is why it can strengthen and deepen a couple’s bond.
• Women who dominate their male partners through pegging find the act to be highly empowering, while men who are on the receiving end can experience their submissive side.
• Long-term spouses acknowledge that anal sex is a simple way to spice things up and try new things in the bedroom.

Anal sex is sometimes considered by others who do not participate in it as being taboo. As such, it is sometimes difficult to find someone to discuss the subject matter. Therefore, to ensure that everyone has a positive first experience, it is crucial to have the appropriate knowledge before you begin on your anal sex journey or experimentation.

Start simply if you are just starting out

• When starting out, begin with using soap and water to wash the outside of the anus after a bowel movement.
• Put some lubrication on your fingers (or a glove) and begin massaging your anus to relax the muscles. It is simpler to penetrate the anus when one is more relaxed. Deep, slow breathing could be beneficial and help you to relax.
• Experiment by inserting one, two, or more fingers past the anus sphincter muscle.
• Feel for the P-spot, which is located two to three inches into the rectum and feels like a soft, spongy bulb, in males. The higher level of arousal makes it easier to locate the spot.
• It is natural to feel the need to urinate when pressure is applied on the P-spot.
• Invite your partner to try rimming your anus by using their tongue if they are there and willing.

Upgrade to toys if playing with your fingers or tongue feels enjoyable!

• It is advised to take your time and try it alone if this is your first time.
• Cleanse the anal area: some people opt to use enemas and/or anal douches after having a bowel movement or simply wash with soap and water if those options aren’t available.
• Make sure you have plenty of lubrication on hand and place a towel underneath the ass in case there is any mess.
• Begin with a small-sized butt plug first.
• If the toy is porous, cover the toy with a condom to keep it clean. Then, lubricate the toy and the anus opening thoroughly with a good lube.
• Relax, taking deep breaths, and use your free hand or a vibrator to touch yourself. Simply enjoy the sensation of the sphincter opening and the insertion of the toy.
• Stop or slow down if it hurts. Then retry pushing yourself further the next day or when you feel up to it again.
• When using a butt plug, the anus will compress automatically over the smaller neck of the plug holding the toy in place once the broadest portion of the plug passes the sphincter muscle.
• Savor the feeling. Feel the sensation of moving your body while the plug is in.
• To experiment with the experience, try pulling or tugging at the toy.
• Try the next larger size toy once it is easy to slip in and out.
• Women can experiment with placing a dildo into their vagina while the butt plug is in place to experience the extra pressure the dildo provides to their A-spot.
• Use a vibrator on the perineum (sometimes called the “taint”) for males or the clitoris for women for added intensity.
• When you are comfortable playing solo, invite a partner to join!

To Clean: Boil the butt plug, dildo or other item used for 5-10 minutes and then wash with an antibacterial soap. Do not use rubbing alcohol or hydrogen peroxide to clean any silicone toy as it will degrade the material over time.

Safety Tips: Use only with a water-based lube. Water-based lubes are a safer lubricant that won’t damage the toy. Do not use with silicone-based lube. Silicone-based lubricants can degrade silicone toys, making them porous, harder to clean, and potentially introducing bacteria.

To Clean:  It’s safer to avoid using rubbing alcohol or other harsh chemicals like bleach or strong detergents on rubber or porous sex toys. Instead, opt for mild hand soap and warm water for cleaning, followed by thorough rinsing and air drying. You can also consider specialized sex toy cleaners designed for the specific material of your toy. 

Safety Tips:  The chemical composition varies with different brands and rubber is a very porous material. Additionally, there are some rubber products that contain phthalates which can be harmful to your health. It’s best to use a condom with these dildos. After use, wash them with mild soap and warm water. Additionally, when switching between holes or users, remember to switch condoms also.

To Clean Your PVC or TPE Realistic Dildo(s): Again, use a washcloth with mild soap and warm water to cleanse your toy. d Allow it to dry completely after each use before storing away.

Safety Tips: Because PVC is a plastic and TPE is a rubber, they sometimes contain chemicals harmful for the body and are more porous. As such, you should always look for ones that are labeled non-porous and phthalate-free to buy, otherwise use a condom with it as a barrier. These types of material don’t withstand extreme heat, so be sure to store it/them in a cool, dark place away from sunlight.

To Clean: Simply wash with soap and water. Additionally, since Pyrex glass toys have excellent heat resistance, they are dishwasher safe.

Safety Tips: You don’t want your glass toys exposed to extreme temperatures because they can retain that extreme temperature for a very long time and you will get burned from its use. Plus, you won’t be able to hold it in your hand, let alone pick it up. Feel free to use them with any lube.

To Clean: These are easy to clean and have several methods for cleaning. You can place them in the dishwasher, boil or soak them in a solution of 90% water and 10% bleach for 10 minutes or just use soap and warm water.

Safety Tips: You can either freeze steel or heat it up before using. But be careful because steel can withstand more extreme temperatures than glass.  Additionally, be careful how cold the steel gets when exploring with temperature play before placing it in the body or onto your skin as it could burn or freeze the delicate skin tissue. As with glass, feel free to use with any type of lubricant.

Vibrating Toys

• Vibrating toys are typically made from silicone, however some can be made from rubber as well
• Since they are made from either silicone or rubber, they have a long usefulness when properly cared for
• Silicone is a hypoallergenic and non-porous material and does not need the use of a condom like you should use one with a rubber style vibrating toy
• Make sure you read about the material makeup of the product you are looking to buy so you can properly maintain and cleanse it

To Clean:

If it has batteries: Remove the batteries, then hand wash and wipe down with a cloth using soap and water. It’s best not to put your vibrating toy in the dishwasher (even if it says it’s water-resistant) nor submerge your vibrating toy in water as the battery compartment will oxidize and cause your toy to malfunction.

If it’s rechargeable: Do not put your vibrating toy in the dishwasher (even if it says it’s water-resistant). Nor submerge your vibrating toy in water. Instead, hand wash and wipe down with a cloth using soap and water.

Safety Tips: Because there are many different manufacturers and products in the marketplace, pay strict attention to the material the manufacturer used when buying your toy(s). This way you can also determine the proper lubricant to use that is compatible with your toy(s). Use condoms with any rubber toy (no matter how little may be in your toy) and when sharing with a partner or inserting them into the vagina or into the anus.

With the market having so many different anal toys, it can be overwhelming deciding where to begin! As such, we would like you to enjoy your initial experience, so here are some popular choices to start off with listed below.

Obviously first is to start small and work your way up.
Purchase an anal training kit that has small, medium, and larger sizes instead of a single size, so your anus has a chance to expand slowly giving you a chance to get used to your anus being penetrated before moving onto other anal toys that are still larger.

Many times, it is normal to feel the urge to go to the bathroom when inserting a plug for the first few times.
Don’t let this feeling distract you to the point that you don’t relax. Having a bowel movement before playing can help relax you and reduce or eliminate the sensation of having to go to the bathroom.

Begin your play alone or with a trusted partner or friend.
Because many feel that anal is a very intimate act, it can make people feel vulnerable and uncomfortable. When done in a safe, comfortable and trusting environment, people tend to open up to entirely new levels of sensation, surrender if in a Dominant/submissive relationship or enhance intimate bonding between the individuals.

For individuals who have moved on to larger girths and depths pushing their limits, they may experience a “bottoming out” where they may experience an altered or inebriated state from the rush of endorphins, adrenaline and dopamine caused by the extreme pressure. It’s always recommended to experiment in safe places and with people you trust if involving another individual.

Use a Lube Shooter to get lubricant inside the rectum.
This might seem weird saying to insert a Lube Shooter into your anus prior to inserting an anal toy however, to make it less frightful use an anal desensitizer first before inserting a Lube Shooter. This helps to not only minimize any mess trying to get lubricant past your anus into your rectum, but it gets the job done quickly and easily.

If you use a douche or an enema, allow time for the fluids to drain before beginning.
When embarking on deeper anal play, it’s nice to begin with a clean rectum so no fecal matter is in the anal canal. Most penises will reach no more than 5-7 inches at most unless you are going to use an extremely long toy (such as an anal snake).

Obviously, let yourself empty out as much fluid as possible over the toilet after using the enema or douche. If you used a lot of water to clean out your rectum, enough that it could have gone deeper into your colon, walk around, stretching your body for about 10 – 20 minutes or as long as you can up to that time, and then allow yourself to empty your bowels again before sexual penetration.

Before beginning lay a protective towel or an absorbing pad.
Just in case any fluids or fecal matter do end up coming out, you don’t want a mess on your hand. The thrusting motion of a penis or anal toy along with contractions you experience can create a back suction pulling any possible remaining water into the rectum. It’s best to be prepared so all you will have to do is remove the towel or pad, take a quick rinse off, and grab a new towel or pad to continue. Today many people purchase “doggy” or pet pads for this specific purpose and may put down several them for a quicker return to anal play.

Open wounds or cuts on your hands are a good reason for wearing gloves.
To protect yourself during anal play, wearing gloves can prevent STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections aka STDs) from being transmitted through open wounds through the blood. Micro-tears in the delicate tissue of the anus is a high possibility during play from which STDs can be transmitted. A glove creates a barrier of protection similar to a condom.

If you want to play with the anus and the vagina. . .
A simple method to adopt when wanting to play with both, take your gloves off when you play with your or your partner’s vagina, and put them on when playing with your or your partner’s anus and rectum to keep bacteria from the anus entering into the vagina.

Numbing Agents in lubricants.
Some anal lubes include numbing agents such as lidocaine in them to desensitize the anus helping to relax the sphincter muscles and help with insertion. Using the same lubricant on a hard penis, can cause the penis to become numb and thus, flaccid. To avoid this possible scenario, it’s best to use a condom. Additionally, using a numbing lube is best for when learning how to relax for the first time or with new toys. However, it’s also good to be cognizant of feeling your anal area, getting feedback if something isn’t comfortable or hurts.